30 Questionable Red-Flag Traits That Somehow Attract Some People

Red flags in relationships are warning signs that often signal trouble ahead. Yet, sometimes, people find themselves irresistibly drawn to these very traits. A recent Reddit thread asked users, “What’s a red flag that you are attracted to?” and the responses were both amusing and eye-opening. Here are some of the most interesting confessions from Redditors who can’t help but fall for trouble.

#1

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Emotionally Unavailable men. And they suck because they have otherwise wonderful qualities as a partner but can’t get over their hump. They also can’t have those serious conversations. One told me they’d rather run into a burning building than talk about their feelings.

#2

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Workaholic men with control issues.

#3

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Very clingy women. I really enjoy being clung to. I’ll wear her as a backpack if she wants, just hold me. :)

#4

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Guys who use humor as a coping mechanism.

#5

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Middle aged drunk sexually liberated women whose kisses taste of smoke and alcohol.

#6

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Obsessive neediness

Codependency is great

Asocial personality towards other people

Possessiveness

Basically a yandere type. If it’s a red flag, that’s cause it catches my attention

#7

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Girls who are into creepy s**t. Sometimes, i think I’m just looking for a female version of myself

#8

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I’m attracted to girls I have no chance with. That’s the real red flag.

#9

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The crazies.

#10

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Jealous, controlling, possessive men.

I love it when a guy demands to check my phone, questions me about where I’ve been, tries to tell me I can’t go out wearing that dress, etc.

I know it’s sooo unhealthy but it’s such a turn on

#11

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Lovebombing and men who are crazy/obsessed with me.

#12

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Depression coded boys with self-deprecating humor/bitterness at the world. I think it’s because I suppress those traits in myself.

#13

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Manipulative as f**k. I love how they work people, I love how they work me and ruin anyone caught between.

#14

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Sarcastic women who spend all their time with their nose in a book.

#15

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Emotional dependence… I have a serious problem with wanting to comfort a sad little guy lol.

#16

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Musicians and artists. They tend to hate themselves, can’t get anything done, bad mental health, unreliable, no money, sometimes substance abuse problems. But damned if I don’t think they’re the only guys interesting enough to bother with. I’m not going to spend my precious time with a guy who works at a bank and wants to go to a baseball game on the weekends.

#17

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I love opinionated girls who’ll argue with me for the sake of it and generally just despise everything.

The one that got away kinda thing was this absolutely stunning Lebanese girl who told my friend to go f**k himself when he tried to peer pressure her into something.

You argue with me and even slightly attractive, I’m immediately smitten.

#18

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Displaying the symptoms of BPD where I’m the limerent object for that person.

Down to do any stupid activity we think of 💯
Excitement 💯
Fun 💯
Best s*x ever 💯

Aaand then it always crashes and burns spectacularly and I’m paranoid there’s a crazy person out for my blood and wondering what it is in me that keeps this cycle going.

Fool me once shame on you, fool me in 70% of my adult relationships and I’m definitely the common denominator here.

#19

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Arrogance and people who believe they’re very intelligent/more intelligent than most people. Or smarter than me, at least.

#20

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A little bit of jealousy/possessiveness…because I am that way too

#21

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Narcissism. Looks a hell of a lot like self confidence until it’s too late.

#22

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Neediness.

I’m an anxious attachment type so when a woman needs me, I feel like I have value.

#23

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I like clingy. Like, send me texts throughout the day. Tell me how much you like me/love me. Send me good morning/good night texts. If there’s something going on in your day message me. Stuff like that. If we’re on the couch together, put an arm around me, just behave like you’re “afraid to lose me” i love that s**t.

My ex really disliked that stuff.

#24

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A f*****g unhinged and inappropriate laugh

#25

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They are terrific in bed, but act slightly odd out of it. That should be a red flag for me. They usually end up being bat s**t crazy once I’ve committed to the relationship.

But to be fair. The common denominator is me. Maybe I *drive* them crazy. Who knows?

#26

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Avoidant attachment styles. From start to finish, I’ve seen the dance I get caught in with these people. It’s not fun, always ends badly, and I know better, but I can’t seem to stay away from them.

#27

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I was told by a girl I dated years and years ago that I’ve had too much success with unavailable women, and I think she was honestly spot on. I think for a long time there, I attached value to the idea of “winning over” or “convincing” a girl I was into that I was totally a high value dude and she should totally date me. That whole “alpha male” b******t, really. Conversely, it caused me to almost be universally disinterested in women who DID express interest in me up front. I always told myself it was cause they all just weren’t my type physically, but I’m not so sure now. Maybe it was always more psychological.

I’m at the point now where I just kinda want something in between: I want a girl who excites me and sparks some feelings of lust, but who is also mutually into me. I’m not really interested in trying to chase or “persuade” people anymore. A mutual chase, maybe. Like “hey, I’m clearly demonstrating that I like you, so let’s play a little game of tag.” That can be fun. But not that whole “on the hunt” mentality.

#28

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Short girls with thick thighs, tattoos, and trauma.

#29

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I like women that everyone else hates. You would think that would be a hint but no

#30

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It’s deemed by society that people who are in a relationship with someone and they decide not to have friends of the opposite s*x is a red flag. To me this is a green flag. It will always be a very very green flag.