25 People Who Chose Not To Have Kids Share Their Thoughts On The Decision

A recent question posed on Reddit, “Married couples that decided NO on kids, what’s your life like?”, sparked a fascinating and diverse array of responses.

#1

Image source: Automatic_Rate1463

As an unwed, childless woman – I am so grateful for my choices. Posting now at 01:49 Thursday morning whilst watching whatever I chose. I spent 2 hours today w 2 friends and both of their 2 year olds and it just reaffirmed my choice. Hearing them complain about their S/Os as well… hard pass to all of that. Y’all can do it.

#2

Amazing…we have Aunty and Uncle Boot Camp where once they turn 18 they come over. We teach them all about personal finance, teach them how to run an equitable house and some relationship advice. We have College Nights where we order pizza apply for scholarships or jobs. The week between Christmas and NYE we have an open house where the kiddos can come and go. Parents usually need a break. Me and Hubby travel, save and do tons of day trips.

Image source: Girlwithnoprez

#3

Image source: Jojo056123, Mikhail Nilov

Well unfortunately the big thing holding us back right now is that we can barely afford to house and feed ourselves. Everyone says “no one can REALLY afford kids” to which I say “okay but if we had kids right now we would starve and die.”

So…not great.

#4

Image source: _Fish_Tacos_, Alena Darmel

Well, my husband decided that cheating on me was a good idea. And now wants an open relationship. So… can just say I’m glad we didn’t have kids. That would be a much messier divorce.

#5

Image source: His_RoyalBadness, Arthur Ogleznev

My sister is 42 and her partner is 46, neither have kids. They’ve retired, moved to Thailand and are enjoying life. This has inspired me to not have kids.

#6

Image source: Loud_Friend3394, cottonbro studio
A lot of people on here have mentioned having access to more materialistic things like more money, travel, house/s etc. but I think it’s also important to mention that being child-free gives you time to be selfless towards others in society rather than just inside your own four walls.
There is so much emotional and physical energy available for volunteer work, caring for abandoned members in society, and running and participating in sports and social groups that it really becomes super emotionally fulfilling and the complete opposite of being lonely both for yourself and the people you’re spending time with.

#7

Image source: Cool_Requirement722, Caleb Oquendo

My wife has a small army of nieces and nephews. So we just rent kids whenever we want one.

#8

Image source: Two4theworld, RDNE Stock project

We are the age (71m &70f) when most would have grandchildren, would want to be near them, be there for the holidays and birthdays. But instead we are just entering our third year of vagabonding around the world, footloose and fancy free. No responsibilities and no worries. Life has been good from the get-go, but now it’s never been better!

#9

Image source: With2, SHVETS production

Quiet. We both grew up in loud, toxic households. None of that bs in our house.

#10

Image source: 30_rack_of_pabst, Emma Bauso

Quiet when we want. Loud when we want. Late when we want. Early when we want.

Whatever we want, whenever we want, assuming our cats get their scheduled meals.

Edit: we have auto feeders on a schedule, they just want their morning and night little wet food meals.

Thanks for the cake day wishes!

#11

Image source: Sweet_Kelly_69, Andre Furtado

It’s pretty freakin awesome. My only reason for not having children is simply a lack of desire. Now that I’m in my 50’s I can honestly say that my current lifestyle is a direct result of not having any. I have far more time, energy and disposable income that I would not have if I’d had children. When I was explaining to the world in my 20’s that I just didn’t want kids, I had no idea that as I aged I would see and appreciate the benefits of being childfree more and more. I didn’t realize until my 40’s that my life was truly affected in a positive way that I can only attribute to no children.

Not a day goes by that I don’t thank my lucky stars I don’t have kids.

I’m truly free.

#12

Image source: thebellybuttonbandit, Anna Shvets

DINKWP here. Its JOYUS! Have the pets. They are spoiled rotten and eat like royality. We dont travel much but we go on lots of dates and cook fabulous meals at home. We love to experiment with new recipes and dont have to worry about “if the kids will eat it”.

#13

Image source: Sharkleberry9000, Josh Willink

It’s wonderful. We travel whenever we want, we have time to spend together and time spent doing other things that interest each other. Money is easier. We rarely argue. We don’t resent each other as I see in so many of my friends marriages. We are well rested and enjoy our lives. Chef recommends.

#14

Image source: Emotional_Onion6386, cottonbro studio

The overwhelming positivity seems really dishonest or maybe this just happened to draw in a lot of highly privileged upper class folks?

I am in my mid-30s and realistically will probably never have kids because it takes all of my energy just to live and function in the U.S. It never felt like a choice, it feels like survival. And with my genetics, I could end up raising a child with significant needs that I am not equipped to meet because I need a lot of support myself. My parents needed support too and didn’t get it, which made growing up being raised by them awful.

It feels like everyone in my life is struggling regardless of whether they have kids or not. What is important to me is family, biological and chosen, and being there for each other. The thought of family dwindling down to nothing and the fracturing of families and communities is terrifying. We need each other.

#15

Image source: absolutemuffin, cottonbro studio

Just back from a trip to Europe last month. We’re having our bathroom remodeled now that we’re home. We’re both contributing the max to retirement accounts, easy peasy. We literally never fight about money or chores.

At the moment, the dog and cat are sleeping on the sofa next to us while my wife studies for a local community college course she’s taking for fun and I watch cooking YouTube.

#16

Image source: LeatherRecord2142, Hutomo Abrianto

…About to install gorgeous off-white wool carpet in the bedrooms without a care in the world. Also flying across the world next week on three days notice for work/fun. That pretty much sums it up!

#17

Image source: i_love_poutines, Ketut Subiyanto

Well I just picked up my husbands wet towel off the bed, yet again, so I still feel like I have a child sometimes despite not giving birth to any.

#18

Image source: W4OPR, mali maeder

Been married 32 years, visited 110 countries, lived in 7, semi retired with 3 dogs, paid off house and 2 rental properties, I’d say life is good.

#19

Image source: JustGenericName, August de Richelieu

Well, I’m not arguing with anyone to brush their teeth or do homework. There has not been a single tear shed today. Definitely not a single scream. My white couch is looking immaculate, I’m researching snorkeling tours for our next vacation and I had a bagel for dinner, because why not?

Although I do have to say, one of the dogs threw up. It’s really ruined the whole day.

#20

Image source: 4th_chakra, 20th Century Studios

*twirls like Julie Andrews on an alpine mountain top on a clear and sunny day*.

#21

Image source: Trillian181, Helena Lopes

Life is life. There are good days and bad days, happy days and sad days. But I imagine there is a lot less stress in our days than there would have been if we had children. We don’t regret, don’t feel like we’re missing out, 8 years in we still don’t want kids. Life is just life.

#22

Image source: UltimaGabe, Savannah Dematteo

Sometimes I just feel really unfulfilled, like I haven’t done anything worthwhile with my life.

Lol jk it’s the best, I can do anything I set my mind to because I don’t have to spend all of my time, energy, and money on anything I don’t want.

#23

I honestly feel guilty sometimes about how great our life is. Because I know it’s better than anyone else I’ve met. Then again, we both worked our asses off to cultivate this life together.

Been married 23 years, met online (mIRC) as teenagers back in 1999. Connected on art, video games, politics, music, introversion, and the strong desire to never have children or pets.

All these years later, it’s amazing. We both quit our jobs in 2009 to focus on our own businesses. Mine did well enough for her to “retire” in 2016. In reality, she helps me with taxes, paperwork, maintaining the house, among many other things, keeping me sane.

We live in a beautiful house, in a quiet, wooded neighborhood. We recently fell head over heels in love with pinball together and have spent a ridiculous amount of time and money on our collection/hobby.

We’re both introverts/homebodies. Unlike a lot of people here, we kinda hate traveling. So we spend our time building up our wonderful nest at home together, with tons of room for high end gaming rigs, workout areas, massive bedroom, all kinds of ridiculous smart home s**t, like voice activated curtains and bidets, 2 kitchens, and we just had a conversation if it’s too decadent to get a 2nd mini fridge for our condiment collection. We have loud parties for just the two of us at least once a week, screaming our heads off, singing karaoke, being idiots.

That’s the joy of being able to spend time with your partner, instead of time and money on something neither of you want. We are closer and more in love than we were as teenagers, dating long distances, across borders, and not seeing each other for months at a time.

I’m sure some people absolutely love being parents, and tell you how much you’ll regret it later in life if you don’t. Yeah, not us. Not a single minute has gone by in our 25 year relationship where we even slightly considered, or regretted having kids or pets.

She just leaned over in bed (sleeping in on a work day cause we work from home) and asked what I was reading. I said, it’s a thread asking “Married couples that decided NO on kids, what’s your life like?” She laughed very heartily and said “Awesome”.

She also had an interested observation on the question posed here:

*“Deciding NO on kids doesn’t make sense. You don’t decide NOT to have kids. You decide TO have kids. It’s a telling skew on the question, reflective of an inherent bias in society, and indicative of the mindless lack of intentionality when it comes to the responsibility of dedicating 20+ years to bringing a new life into this world.”*

I agree. Smart woman. Glad I don’t have any noisy a*s kids or dogs to distract me from listening to her.

Image source: randomawesome

#24

Image source: caverunner17, Andrea Piacquadio

Just got back from a 3 week trip to Europe. And went to Peru for thanksgiving last year.

All for about *half* of what my best friend spent on childcare last year.

#25

Image source: Blanhooey_fan_club, Matt Hardy

Sometimes we get up at sunrise to go surf and eat breakfast on the beach. Sometimes we stay in bed till the last minute before work. Everyday is mainly doing what we feel like doing which creates a very happy life.