30 People Reveal The Key Moments That Led To Their Breakups
Relationships are complex, and often it’s the little moments that can make or break them. On a recent Reddit thread, users were asked to share the defining moment in their last relationship that made them say, “Yup, I’m breaking up with you.”
The responses were candid, heartfelt, and sometimes downright infuriating, offering a glimpse into the diverse experiences of Redditors in matters of the heart. Scroll below to read some of them.
#1
Image source: gloomloon, Kevin McCutcheon
While I was finishing up engineering school, he said to me “As long as I make more money, I don’t have to contribute as much to cooking and cleaning—my contribution is set”. Considering he was an established engineer for Ford, and we had been dating for 4 years, I realized that I would rather not be his house slave on a journey to catch up.
#2
Image source: aesthesia1, Timur Weber
He asked if I would be his “plan B”.
BTW, mad props to Alicia for being the girl he was going to cheat on me with if she’d given him the chance. You are the reason we had the conversation that produced this revelation. I have no idea who you are, I’ve never seen you, I’ve never met you. But you saved me. You opened my eyes. Thank you, and thank you even more for snubbing him like the creep that he is lmao.
#3
Image source: ginger_princess2009, River Kao
He picked up my cat and threw him across the room because he laid on me…he was jealous of the damn cat.
#4
Image source: Sp1d3rb0t, Isabella Fischer
Man I just wanted to sleep. He wouldn’t f*****g let me.
He’d always been controlling, and I put up with it for way too long.
One morning as he was berating me for wanting to sleep after working third shift, I realized that this was going to be my life if I didn’t bail: working my a*s off at work, and running the household at home, all while being treated like s**t for wanting/needing help.
Once he realized I was serious, he changed his tune but it was just way too little, way too late.
#5
Image source: xxSKSxx_, Markus Winkler
We were on vacation and on our way to get our luggage when they turned to me and said “I’m glad we’re together but damn I bet I’d be just as happy to be with some of the other women around here.”
I didn’t reply and I’d be debating whether to break up anyway but that was the final straw. I still remember their face looking around while saying that.
#6
Image source: Puzzled-Mushroom8050, Priscilla Du Preez
Found d**k pics on his phone he’d sent to some woman on Twitter, then a dm conversation with a sex worker making an appt to see her. He’d also been having an emotional affair with someone he’d met online while I was going through cancer treatments. I was just done.
#7
Image source: thinkinginkling, anonymous
For example, the last boyfriend i had would neglect me, never do anything for me, blow me off for other people, and sometimes even insult me. but if im honest the thing that really turned it around for me was that he left a dove chocolate wrapper on my floor (when he came to visit me for the first time in weeks). idk why that was the turning point for me. i just had a vision of cleaning up his messes for the rest of time and even though i didn’t break up with him then it definitely set me on that path lmao. that little blue wrapper sitting on my nice clean carpet…i just can’t.
#8
I have an extreme level of loyalty and commitment, sometimes to my own detriment, so I’ve never reached that moment, despite tonnes of red flags and things I would have loved to walk away from. My ex-fiancé just broke up with me a couple weeks ago after 10 years together, and it came as a massive shock but I’m feeling so much better now. No more 3-day-old curry breath, no more bowls full of mouldy milk left upstairs for a week, no more teenage boy behaviour from a 30-year-old man, no more feeling lonely while he spends every waking minute sitting upstairs away from me, no more awful sex that lacks basic stamina… yeah, I’m done lmao.
Since we broke up I’ve started taking much better care of myself. Tending to my personal care more efficiently because I’m no longer depressed, eating better (I’ve lost 7lbs so far), moving/exercising more, my skin condition has just GONE, I’m laughing more, and generally feeling like I’ve got a fricking future again. I feel awesome.
Image source: TLMoore93
#9
Image source: SaebraK, Narciso Arellano
The last ex was a nice enough guy. We were long distance, 1 state away. So he’d come spend the weekend with me once or twice a month.
The last he visited we had the discovery Channel on and it was some show about dinosaurs. He laughed at one point and said “yeah right the earth is only 4000ys old.”
That’s when it clicked, his family were born again Christians. The dinosaurs are a devil hoax and earth is 4k years old type. I knew instantly it wouldn’t work. I cannot be with a science denier.
#10
Image source: ChamomileBrownies, cottonbro studio
Not my last relationship, but my first serious relationship.
It was our one year anniversary. He brought his dad.
#11
Went out for a night to myself for once. My ex husband said that if I didn’t come home (I’d only been out an hour at that point) that he would go to every bar in the area to hunt me down and “bring me home”.
Image source: DoorEmotional
#12
We went to a concert and in that moment I realized something was wrong. I shouldn’t be here with him. I loved the band, but wasn’t excited because of who I was there with. It made me realize that something wasn’t right. I know this sounds weird, but it opened my eyes. I slowly began to realize that nothing in our relationship excited me or made me happy anymore.
Image source: FromUNautrePlanet
#13
Image source: PugWitch, Priscilla Du Preez
The final straw was:
Me: “I need emotional support”
Him “Can’t you get that from your friends?”.
#14
When I found out he hacked my email. Did you know that through your gmail account you can access literally everything? Like Google maps history and Google history? I didn’t until that day.
I had absolutely nothing to hide. But found out he had been literally stalking my every move and location for months. I felt so completely violated.
Image source: leamerlena
#15
He cheated on me with his ex and then told his mom that I kicked him out and made him sleep on the street because he “made a mistake.” I didn’t. I chose to leave and stay with a friend. I woke up the next morning to 100 messages from her telling me what a piece of s**t I am for making her baby boy sleep outside over a mistake.
He also stole my Xanax and then blamed me for leaving my lockbox open. I also didn’t do that, but the fact that I had to keep them locked up in the first place was lost on him. Was single for years after that.
Image source: babythrottlepop
#16
I was very happily in love, and was confident we could work through anything until he said, “sometimes I wish you were skinnier.” That broke me as I am very self conscious about my weight.
Image source: trader_joes_wine
#17
We were long distance. He slept over, and was leaving the next day. I get home. Bed is unmade. Tags from the new shirt he left on the floor.
I don’t think he was expecting me to have standards for men. He was used to doing the least he could do to get by. I also don’t think he expected it to be over like that.
Image source: indicatprincess
#18
I wasn’t a priority.
Image source: BasuraIncognito
#19
The whole relationship was f****d up but this was the catalyst to end it.
I was two hours away in the city for a week for work, and I was busy from 5:30am until 9pm every day so I couldn’t constantly be messaging her. So she pretended to OD on pain pills so she could be sent to the big hospital in that particular city. I still remember receiving the “okay, you can visit me now ?” message. Like what the f**k. I’m away for a WEEK. Seven days! And I can’t leave work because I had no transport (we all rode to the complex in a van).
Unfortunately for her she was sent to a psych ward and I was able to tell the doctors that she was harassing me so she had her phone taken off her. So she borrowed another patient’s phone and started messaging me on that. After that I told the doctors the whole story and asked to be removed as her emergency contact. She managed to convince a receptionist that she needed to contact me and called me again from a hospital phone. I had to inform the doctors AGAIN and she must have had all phone privileges revoked after that.
When I was home and found out she’d been released I messaged her saying it was over. So she rode her moped an HOUR in the dark to come to my house and lied saying a friend had dropped her off and she had no way home so she had to stay (I live in the middle of nowhere). Then she assaulted me physically when I tried to leave the room to get my phone. I managed to throw her on the ground and went and called the cops. When she realised they were on the way she tried to take pills again so after they arrested her she didn’t even spend the night in the cells, she was sent to the hospital and monitored instead.
That was pretty much the last contact I had with her bar a few stalker moments and her constant messaging online. I arranged with her friend to drop all her s**t off in a public parking lot during the day and I never replied to her ever again. She had my phone number memorised and would text and call all the time, so I changed my number. I blocked every new account of hers that popped up. I remember that in one of her profile pics she had cut and dyed her hair to the exact same style as mine. She also sent me a request on a dating app with a picture of a celebrity who has the same first name as me, and the name of the dating profile was my cat’s name (he’s named after a Pokémon). It also had her star sign. By that stage I had a Protection Order against her and when I showed an officer the screenshot of the profile she was like “is this girl an idiot?” They must have warned her she was close to being arrested again because she stopped contacting me after that. But it took literal YEARS to get to that point.
The great takeaway from the whole thing is that she always dreamed of moving to Australia to work, but with a DV record she won’t even be allowed to enter the country to visit, let alone work.
Image source: MarsupialNo1220
#20
I was pregnant and he was really not wanting to work. He finally got a job and worked for three hours before coming home and telling me the job really wasn’t “for him.” I knew he was never gonna help support the baby or myself and I wouldn’t be able to take any time off work after having the kid. Left him like two weeks later at 9 weeks pregnant
Edit: he also didn’t help around the house at all, didn’t cook or clean. Literally just played video games all day long.
Image source: bordermelancollie09
#21
I used to tuck in my shirts all the time when I was younger cause I like it when my clothes are tight it makes me feel safe.
We were chilling out on his trampoline and he just turns to me and goes “why do you always tuck your shirts in?” And without letting me answer he pinned me down, pulled all the layers I had on up, grabbed my breasts and layed on top of me so I couldn’t move.
I was 16.
Image source: No-Opening-2817
#22
He was abusive in every single way. Together 11 years….. the day he cheated on me I left. In my mind at the time, it was the only way I could get out without him blaming me…. He still did! I regret every day, not leaving him sooner!
Image source: Consistent-Bend-8039
#23
Relationship was on the rocks for about a year, had multiple fights and I considered seriously ending it three times before our final fight. He always wanted me under his thumb at all times so when he told me to leave, which he never allowed me to do during a fight, I took my cat and told him I’m done.
Image source: aspendaydream
#24
A close family member had just died and he was complaining because he wanted sex. Apparently I was supposed to reward him because he offered to (insisted on) driving me to the funeral??
Image source: MoodyBlu_2729
#25
I was unable to have a calm and mature conversation about our relationship, expectations, and future. I was shamed for my general curiosity about various subjects (they disliked that I have many interests and hobbies). Just felt uncomfortable and exhausted by their presence and behavior. My feelings for them naturally diminished, and I gave up.
Image source: atomicallyseparated
#26
Not my last relationship, but the one before. He neglected me and always made it sound as if my expectations from him were unrealistic, or it would just be my fault I wasn’t receiving attention. He also didn’t respect me in bed. So the last straw was when I tried to start a fun conversation about foreplay. In short, he got extremely angry, saying he’s always been trying to please me, and I should know what he wants without asking him. This time instead of crying myself to sleep, I slept soundly, knowing the guy was definitely addicted to p**n.
Image source: buntywoo
#27
Image source: vinylsleepover, callicocallie
He insisted on sleeping with a blanket that had a giant photo of Taylor Swift on it and would make me watch her concert documentaries almost every time we hung out.
There were also multiple women messaging me on social media telling me he was a creep and harassed them which was a major red flag for me.
#28
I had a panic attack and fainted (in a car in a mostly-empty parking lot) and he told me I was embarrassing him.
Image source: xylitolbaby
#29
Image source: Mia2354, cottonbro studio
We did shrooms and i was like holy s**t i actually hate this guy.
#30
Image source: Smemz88, Chris Lawton
She voted for brexit.
Got wisdom to pour?